Thursday, 20 April 2017
In which One encounters a silly boy...
A young gentleman of my acquaintance told me yesterday that his best friend had 'given birth'
'How jolly nice' thinks I, 'tis a fairly recent phenomenon that young persons have BF's of the opposite sex'
When One was young, boys were an oily, spotty mystery and a girl's best friend was another girl.
'He phoned me from the hospital in a right old panic,' continued the cove.
Hmmmm, thought I. Curious. Other things must have undergone radical changes whilst One has been minding One's own bees-tiddly-wax...
To my certain knowledge it has always been the singular preserve of the female of the species to 'give birth'
But he blathered on, dropping the 'he's just given birth' nonsense into the conversation, so I know I didn't mis-hear it.
'Crikey!' thought I, 'The TV'll be all over this one. Never mind the Taunton Gazette.'
SOMERSET MAN GIVES BIRTH! I can see it now.
Unless, of course, the eejit's best friend is a sea horse.
Stupid, STUPID boy.