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Monday, 3 October 2016

In which One is resigned to One's fate...

Reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated, Dear Reader...
However, One has undergone a metamorphosis of such epic proportions of late, that One is discombobulated in the extreme.
One, having begun the month of September in the gainful employ of The Shit-Face, moved on to be 'Claire in the Community' and ended the month as a supervisor in a delightful little establishment flogging scoffage to the great unwashed.
'What happened to your little 'Nurse on Wheels' car and your desire to help those in need?' I hear you enquire, Dear Reader.
Well, it's like this..
One, being unable to get up at five each day, dash from one distressed article to the next, until ten at night, and, after returning home at eleven, doing it all again day after gruelling day, though...
'Bollicks!'
One has done One's bit for the poor and needy, so they can go whistle for a Romanian teenager next time they need shopping/arse wiping/lunch/wee/poo bags emptying etc...
ONE IS DONE
One drove the little car back, ripped of One's uniform, flung the inadequate phone in the boot, discarded the aprons and gloves and legged it back to the Underground Lair pretty sharpish.
Yes, One is now without a ve-hicle, but One doesn't give a rat's fat...
And, even though One isn't even earning enough to keep body and soul together, let alone pay the mortgage, One is relieved to have eschewed the world of shite/bite/kick/punch/clothes ripped off etc...
Not that any of the old persons physically assaulted One, but a goodly amount of them were rude, ungrateful, unpleasant old harridans and and they can all feck right off as far as One is concerned.
One, not knowing what manner of gutter One shall ultimately end up in, is resigned to One's fate.
After all, One has been a captain of industry, a fair to middling painter, lived high on the hog afore plummeting down the food chain to end up here, unlike the majority of the eejits One has recently encountered whose tiny little lives will stagnate in the West Somerset miasma since they give themselves credit for more intelligence than they have and fail to recognise their limitations.

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