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Saturday, 7 February 2015

In which the stairs are cleaned at last...

It has come to One's attention that someone has been taking photographs of One's butt over the back fence.
One's recently 're-bored and reconditioned downpipe features in some Polaroid swinger images too.
'Will your shapely butt be featuring on the front cover of Vogue?' One hears you chorus Dear Reader.
Sadly no, Dear Reader.
One's butt still appears to be the current fixation of the Uber Luitnent even though 'Tis currently disconnected from the fully functional down pipe.
Sadly One, being tumour-ridden and currently unemployed, One hasn't the financial wherewithal to purchase and install a working pipe to replace the current working pipe already in situ, as ordered by a legal personage. To be completed, photographed and proven within fourteen days 'or suffer the consequences.'
One is mystified by all the goings on since One's butt has been there, and known of, for the entire duration of One's ownership of the Underground Lair.
One is forced, therefore, to acknowledge that One is viewed in the manner of an irritating louse in the matted hair of womankind.
In one tiny glimmer of sunshine through the clouded skies: The litigation budget (paid for by all residents, including One) would appear to have been broken into to finally get the hallways and stairs cleaned.

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