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Thursday, 13 November 2014

In which One is seeking a quiet corner…


‘She loves you, yeah, yeah, yeah’…

One painted the above whilst waiting for a further masterpiece to dry.

‘Not bad’ thinks One, ‘The A of the F might like that’.

‘It’s not a ‘Red Crane’ or a ‘Minehead’, came the dismissive and disinterested reply when One had emailed it for approval.

Just in case you are unaware, Dear Reader, ‘Red Crane’ and ‘Minehead’ are two much dissed  (by the A) former masterpieces.

Should you wish to add your disinterest, please visit where you may ‘not buy’ them at your leisure.

The website is, of course, hopelessly out of date (presided over by vile ex H)  and the only place to keep one step ahead of One is to visit the rake of galleries that stock One’s doings, or ‘friend’ One on facebook, whereupon you will be automatically frogmarched to ‘Claire Rice Art.’

Any who, back to me preev complaint…

‘Red Crane’ is constantly referred to by the A of the F, since it is one of only three (yes, three) paintings One has ever done that didn’t sell. 

Even ones that One has biffed over One’s shoulder in disgust have been carefully picked out of the pile of fag ends and sweet wrappers by Dear Little S and sold.

But the poor old ‘Red Crane’ much maligned by the A remains in the studio festering.  As do the 150 limited edition prints, of which feck all has been shifted.

One must find a lonely little corner for the storage of ‘Red Crane’ prints, ‘Minehead’ placemats, ‘She love you’ and One, apparently…

‘Minehead’ on the other hand was sold to some cove who’s Ma lived there.  It also lives on as a placemat (yes One does homewares and is a regular little Martha Stewart) a massive crate of which are currently residing in the sitting room of the A of the F.


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