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Thursday, 8 May 2014

In which One is going back to bed…

This time last year - £1,377.50

This year – £52.50

That’s just from one gallery… 

What the feck is the problem with you selfish bastards?  Are you spending all your money on food?  Has the acquisition of art become so low down on the agenda that you are merely purchasing my cards and framing them.

(No, scratch that! Don’t give the cheap losers ideas.)

Do you Birmingham (and places even worse than that) based stingy bleeders realise that One is on the cusp of having to get a job!

You come down here buying food and dictating that food halls and cafes take up the primo locations in shopping villages et al.

The purveyance of Art is now taking place in a location that requires the holiday maker to be armed with a machete in order to slash and burn their way to the gallery area. (Dartington Hall, you will live to regret your foolish actions!)

That is, the few galleries that are struggling on throughout these shite times.

Well, that’s it!  If you don’t start buying my works of art forthwith One will have to start favouring Aldi with me Pinot purchases and we don’t want that do we?

What is the point of One even getting out of me jim jams, eh?  What is the use of showering and putting me face on?  Why bother rolling out of the truckle bed at all?

Farewell cruel world.  I’m going back to bed.


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